Advertisement
question

What should I do if my partner doesn't want sex but still masturbates?

Emily Nagoski
Emily Nagoski on behalf of Good In Bed
Psychology
answer
Both women and men may want to masturbate but not want sex because having interest in sex is not the same as having interest in having an orgasm. The nice thing about masturbation or a vibrator is that it can provide a quick, easy, complication-free orgasm.

Separate the masturbation from the lack of sex -- I really believe they’re not related. It’s just not in the same category as sex with you.

Talk to him or her about finding a way back to a sexual connection with you. What works for many couples is agreeing to non-sexual touching a few nights a week. Women are more likely to feel interested in sex after foreplay has started.

Continue Learning about Sexual Health and Relationships

Recognizing and treating sexual addiction
Recognizing and treating sexual addiction
If you’ve followed the news in recent years, you may have heard of a condition called sexual addiction. A number of celebrities—including Tiger Woods,...
Read More
Older, wiser, and sexually healthier?
Older, wiser, and sexually healthier?
Many things improve with age. Fine wine, for instance, grows more complex, more enjoyable, and more valuable. So why not consider the possibility that...
Read More
What can I do if I have cramping after intercourse?
What can I do if I have cramping after intercourse? Cramping after intercourse occurs because of con...
More Answers
How does conflict affect a couple’s sex life?
Over time, the cycle of fighting takes its toll on one or both partners, and sex no longer becomes a...
More Answers

Important: This content reflects information from various individuals and organizations and may offer alternative or opposing points of view. It should not be used for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. As always, you should consult with your healthcare provider about your specific health needs.