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You can do the following to help your partner overcome his porn addiction:
- Ask him to lay off the porn. This means cold turkey. He doesn't have to go porn-free forever, but see if a two-month break has a positive effect on his desire, arousal, and orgasm. This can give you both the opportunity to "get real" without celluloid triggers.
- When he masturbates, he should use his mind to create the pictures, and try recalling single episodes of sex. It's like the difference between reading and watching TV. This is a great opportunity for him reconnect with his erotic history and his own catalog of sexy memories.
- Increase the mental novelty with your partner. Share fantasies and role play. Before you have intercourse, get yourself to a point where you're at peak physical and mental arousal.
- Keep the lines of communication open. This should be an ongoing process that is not just for the purpose of discussing difficulties, but also to explore curiosities, share ideas and desires, and be playful and fun. You can talk about how earlier in your relationship you may have flirted or think about sex with each other more frequently, and discuss ways of revisiting this playfulness with one another. Remember that it is more productive and well received when the topic of sexuality and your sex life is approached during neutral times, not when you are ready to or already having sex.
- Seek professional help. If a guy denies he has a problem, you need to decide if the difficulties you find in your sex life need to be addressed by a therapist. You should always share with your partner your expectations of maintaining your sexual health and desire to avoid sexually transmitted diseases. Otherwise, you have to learn to trust your gut and decide where you want to set parameters for your own happiness. It's not about becoming demanding or argumentative; it's about deciding what you will live with and what you won't live with.
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Important: This content reflects information from various individuals and organizations and may offer alternative or opposing points of view. It should not be used for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. As always, you should consult with your healthcare provider about your specific health needs.