What should I do if I want to date someone from my 12-Step group?

Sheila Dunnells
Addiction Medicine
If you are asking that question, I am assuming you are in new sobriety and your sponsor has advised against it. Finding someone attractive, who shares your desire to remain sober, is certainly compelling. However, your sponsor is correct. Don't do it.

At this point in your life, your sobriety comes first. Look back. If you started hanging out with girls at sixteen, you have at least five or six years of relationships behind you. As each relationship became difficult, upsetting, or started to fall apart, how did you handle it? Chances are you ran to your drug of choice. Did it solve anything or did it only make you feel worse about yourself? If you have started thinking about 'people you have harmed' are any of your former girlfriends on the list? If so, you may need to learn more about how to be in a healthy relationship.

As much as the idea of finding a quick fix for your emotions is appealing, remember it can be a road to relapse. This is not the time for getting high on anything, including getting high on a new fling.

Continue Learning about Substance Abuse and Addiction

Hidden Hookah Dangers
Hidden Hookah Dangers
The use of hookahs -- pipes that bubble tobacco smoke through water before you puff -- doubled among middle- and high-schoolers in just one year. Now ...
Read More
Should I worry that my elderly mom consumes more than one drink a day?
More than one drink a day puts your elderly mom above the recommended limit of no more than seven dr...
More Answers
How can I help someone who is addicted to drugs?
Mercy HealthMercy Health
To help someone who is addicted to drugs, first recognize that you can't fix the problem yourself. T...
More Answers
How Can I Identify Harmful Substance Use or Addiction?
How Can I Identify Harmful Substance Use or Addiction?

Important: This content reflects information from various individuals and organizations and may offer alternative or opposing points of view. It should not be used for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. As always, you should consult with your healthcare provider about your specific health needs.