How can I be sexually connected to my partner during periods of stress?

When you're coping with stress, it's important to stay connected to your partner. Here are some tips for maintaining (or getting back) that important intimacy:
  • Make a list. Learn about yourself and what brings you sensual and sexual pleasure. Tell your partner exactly what you like in bed. For instance, if there's a move or position you really love but haven't tried in years, try it the next chance you get.
  • Make another list -- for your partner. Include all the things that get you in the mood. It could be as simple as having your partner put the kids to bed and clean the kitchen after dinner so you can have some downtime or as complex as the both of you learning to communicate feelings so you can feel closer emotionally.
  • Learn to play. Other than a board game or a game of catch with your kids, when was the last time you played with your partner? Have the two of you ever played? Well, now is the time. Try a round of golf in which you get a kiss for every stroke. Or feed each other your favorite foods: try licking whipped cream off each other's bodies or substitute some other pleasurable treat.
  • Write love letters. Describe why you fell in love with each other and why you still love each other.
  • Touch each other. For one week, spend time each day touching each other with the understanding that you will not have sex. Now imagine how you'll feel by day seven!
  • Get another opinion. Ask a friend whose opinion you trust to describe your partner's and your best qualities.
  • Get a couples massage.
  • Get away. Out of the house -- even out of town, if possible. Rent a room in a place and only leave the room for meals. Or, order room service! If the budget is tight, create romance wherever you can afford. Go out for an inexpensive romantic date one night a week. A moonlit walk in the park can be very romantic.
  • Learn something new. Tell each other three things your partner does not know about you. Then have your partner do the same.
  • Rent an adult movie or read passages from an erotic book to each other. Buy a flavored massage oil, share with your partner and play!

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Important: This content reflects information from various individuals and organizations and may offer alternative or opposing points of view. It should not be used for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. As always, you should consult with your healthcare provider about your specific health needs.