Some of us have experienced sexual abuse in childhood or as adults. The aftereffects of abuse vary in severity, but they can last a long time. Abuse issues are sometimes triggered unexpectedly during pregnancy, labor, and birth, in the form of conscious memories or flash backs to the abuse, or unconscious body memories (tension, anger, sick feelings, or other discomfort) when a woman is reminded of the abuse in some way.
Common triggers for those of us who are survivors include vaginal exams or other invasive procedures, and pain during or after childbirth, especially in the vagina, but also in the abdomen, back, breasts, and perineum. Our interactions with our care providers - authority figures who may expect compliance and trust - may remind us of our perpetrator or perpetrators, with whom we may have felt helpless, unequal, submissive, or overpowered. Control over our bodies, our contractions, or the emergence of the baby - and being controlled by the baby, whose needs come before our own, can be major issues for us. We may associate a lack of control with being abused. We may have learned that remaining in control is essential to safety and being out of control is threatening.
Reminders during pregnancy or labor to "relax and it won't hurt," to "yield" or "surrender" to the contractions, to "trust your body" or "do what your body tells you to do" may have an effect opposite to the one intended, if we have learned to guard against giving up control in abusive situations. Abuse experiences may also leave us feeling that our bodies are damaged and untrustworthy.