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How can I bring genuine attention and closeness in my relationships?

Lisa Oz
Health Education

When I feel my attention drifting or my mind wandering, I use a couple of tricks to bring myself back to what is happening around me. The first is not much of a trick, it is just forcing myself to listen to what is being said. For example, my son likes to tell me about his inventions. Often, it happens when I am in the middle of making dinner, so I just nod and say, "Oh, that's nice," which is unsatisfying for him and boring for me. If I stop chopping the vegetables and actually pay attention to him - make eye contact, examine the diagram, and respond with real interest, - then he feels that I care about him, I gain some insight into the workings of my child's mind, and we both feel closer.

It is important to listen, not just to the words, but also to the subtext. Pay attention to the intention behind the conversation. In addition, be aware of what your motivations are. What do you want to communicate and is it coming across?

Another thing I do to stay in the moment is to heighten the awareness of my environment on a sensory level. I try to discern ambient sounds, smells, temperatures, and textures. I look closely at the space I am in and the faces of those with me. This practice always brings my focus back to where I am.

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Important: This content reflects information from various individuals and organizations and may offer alternative or opposing points of view. It should not be used for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. As always, you should consult with your healthcare provider about your specific health needs.