Should I work alone toward healing?

Having made a space for trusting yourself, now you need someone else to trust. Healing is not a matter of solitary work.

Don't automatically put your best friend, spouse, or big sister at the top of your list. Be objective about who is emotionally available and who isn't. Look for someone who is tolerant and accepting of their own flaws, someone who listens well and doesn't impose their own judgments on others. These are people you can begin to trust. Approach such a person and ask permission to share one kind of distress that you really want to talk about. Sharing is crucial, for if you expect them to be open to you, it is only fair that you be open to them. However, it is entirely justified that you ask for a privileged time when the talk will be solely about you if you are feeling acute distress. The implied bargain is that when they feel their own distress, you will be available. Be sensitive to when you have gone too far and are just using another person's sympathetic ear as a dumping zone. Don't ask for advice. The best use of sympathy is to find someone whom you trust enough to begin the process of release that you must continue on your own.

Your intention is to bring shy, hidden, embarrassing, guilty, or shameful energies into view. This exposure sets the stage for dealing with these energies.