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When getting remarried, how can I help my children accept my fiance?

Hal Runkel
Hal Runkel on behalf of ScreamFree
Marriage & Family Therapy
If you're getting remarried and you want your child to warm up to your fiancé, much of that will depend on the two of them. Any resistance on the part of your child shouldn't stop your spouse-to-be from assuming a new role in the family. Consistency and love will help your child develop trust, and trust is a conduit to respecting a new step-parent's authority.

Here are some ways to help the process along:
  • Don’t persist in your child's acceptance of your fiancé; it might backfire.
  • Back up a little from the triangle that exists to allow the relationship between your child and fiancé to develop naturally.
  • Embrace the role as the sole authority until that relationship is naturally developed. Remember, if you are too quick to throw your fiancé into that role, the more your child will resist him or her.
  • Stay cool throughout the process.

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Important: This content reflects information from various individuals and organizations and may offer alternative or opposing points of view. It should not be used for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. As always, you should consult with your healthcare provider about your specific health needs.