Dr. Michele Borba answered:
Remember the motherly advice that was the soundtrack to your childhood? Read on for a true or false quiz that sheds light on some of those classic motherhood words of advice.
“When it comes to kids, you’ve got to pour on the praise.”
VERDICT: FALSE! It’s okay to be proud of our kids and certainly to encourage them when they’ve done well. But we have to be careful how we praise our kids. Problem is, most parents tend to stress the child’s intelligence, showering them with accolades such as “You’re so smart”—and the praise backfires. Children who are praised for their intelligence assume that success is solely a matter of how smart he is and not in how hard he works. The result: a fixed mind set, with detrimental long-lasting effects. Stress the process, the hard work or stick-to-it-ness, and not the end product, like a grade or final score is what matters.
“Don’t be afraid to say to no.”
VERDICT: TRUE! Loving your kids and wanting them to be happy doesn’t mean that you have to be the yes-man in their lives. Saying yes to our kids every whim does not do them any favors. In fact, it can actually lower their self-esteem and cause them to become more materialistic. A University of California at Davis study followed 7,500 tweens for seven years and found those with the highest self-esteems were raised in homes that were warm but also less permissive. Translation: they lived in a household that had structure, clear rules and a parent who was not afraid to say no. In a study by the University of Minnesota it was discovered that the more materialistic a child is, the less happy and appreciative he is, which actually increases his risk for depression.
“Your child should clean his plate at every meal.”VERDICT: False!! Remember all those nights as a kid when you were forced to stay at the dinner table until every last bite was eaten off your plate? For years, mothers have been encouraging their children to become members of “the clean plate club” in hopes of encouraging them to expand their palettes and receive necessary nutrition. However, that the new parenting science suggests that when children are forced to clean their place it actually increases picky eating habits, not to mention creating stressful meal time battles. Research shows us that it can take some time for kid’s taste buds to kick in, so instead of throwing in the towel (or the veggies) take your time and try, try again.Find out more about this book: The Big Book of Parenting Solutions: 101 Answers to Your Everyday Challenge...Remember the motherly advice that was the soundtrack to your childhood? Read on for a true or false quiz that sheds light on some of those classic motherhood words of advice. “When it comes to kids, you’ve got to pour on the... More