You can try a number of things at home that may help your sexual problems.
Working with your partner
- Increase the level of intimacy and foreplay with your partner before penetration.
- Experiment with different sex positions to find the most comfortable ones.
- Think about changing your setting and routine to improve your time together. Do you have enough privacy and time? Are you interested in trying something new?
- Try talking and listening to each other more. This includes talking openly about sex, what each of you needs and what you want to do differently together.
Foreplay and relaxation
You may be able to increase your sexual desire and arousal with:
- Masturbation, possibly with the aid of a vibrator and/or with your partner.
- Sensual massage and other pleasurable physical activities without sexual intercourse.
- Fantasies, distractions, music or erotic videos or books.
- Reducing anxieties before sexual activity, perhaps by taking a warm bath.
Lack of lubrication in the vagina is the most common cause of pain with sex.
Nonprescription water-based products that provide vaginal lubrication can help. You can typically find these products, such as Astroglide and K-Y Jelly, at pharmacies, usually near the condoms.
Vaginal moisturizers, such as Replens, are not for use right before sexual intercourse. But when used regularly, they can help with vaginal dryness.
Exercises for pelvic muscles
Exercises can help you develop muscular control of contraction and relaxation of the pelvic muscles. This can increase sexual arousal and improve orgasm. You can improve pelvic floor muscle strength using Kegel exercises or vaginal weights.
Vaginal weights usually come in five sizes. You start with the smallest weight, and work up to the largest over time. Insert a weight into your vagina, then hold it in place while standing upright for 15 minutes. Your muscles will feel the urge to tighten and hold it in.
After a few days, the vaginal muscles become strong enough that they no longer feel an urge to hold the weight. This is when you use the next larger weight. When you've used all five weights, keep your muscles toned by using the largest weight for 5 to 7 days in a row each month.
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