Question

Alcoholism

What should I do if my husband is drinking a lot and lying about it?

A Answers (2)

  • ACharles Sophy, MD, Psychiatry, answered

    Coping with an alcoholic spouse can tremendously take a toll on you and your family. Find a support group, go to Al-anon meetings, and learn all you can about addictions. When your husband is willing to admit he has a problem, find places he can turn to for help in getting better.

  • AFredrick Wade, Addiction Medicine, answered
    I think your research of this question is a sound first step on your part! Unless you are truly knowledgeable about addiction, you should do exactly what you are doing by seeking help and direction. Now, when someone you love has developed, or is believed to have developed an addiction, you have a number of concerns to consider. First, will they talk openly with you about their drug or alcohol use? If so, are they willing or open to getting an addiction assessment?

    It may be useful to consider seeing a Licensed Psychotherapist or Certified Addiction professional, for yourself, to help you sort out how you are feeling so you can decide what steps to take with your husband (e.g. getting an intervention; asking him to get an assessment, etc.) and what boundaries to employ to best care for yourself now and going forward.  Getting clear about your needs, how to care for yourself, and establishing some introductory boundaries is very important to your being able interact with your husband and not become unwittingly a part of the problem. Sometimes all one can do is care for themselves.

    If your husband is interested in help, he should lead the charge so that treatment is designed to meet his needs. If he is not interested in getting help, then you may want to explore intervention options by seeking the help of a Certified Addiction professional or Licensed Psychotherapist who specializes in addiction treatment.
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